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RUST ON MY SOUL (A Novel) (Published by Bridge Press in 1985 & Distributed Internationally)
INTRODUCTION (Repeated for those new to the series)
In an old loose leaf notebook, Thomas Kettering wrote when there was a cry from his heart. He wrote when his inner longing spilled over into the reality of his days. He did not write every day, only when he felt he must. How often he wrote or when is not important. The journey is what counts, for it is a diary about all of us, to all of us. “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step,” and even a stumble is a step.
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Mid-Afternoon
Fired! At my age, fired. My God, what do I do now? I was speechless as D.L. quietly informed me my services were no longer needed. The shock waves of my unbelief ricocheted off the old familiar walls.
It hurt. Trust – mine – lay tattered, dirty, dragged through the mud of unconcern. I should have been shocked. The company will save a bundle on my pensions. It happens all the time “Business is not hardhearted, just practical.” I’ve said that. How prophetic.
I’m still shaking and not only just inside now. My hands tremble with rage at the indignity. Resigning is one thing, but being fired! What do I tell people?
Nancy. How do I break it to her that she’s now the breadwinner in this family? Thank heavens I haven’t mentioned the vacation idea I was planning to her. Looks like I’ll have one, but not the kind I anticipated.
It was a quiet civilized cutting of the cord. Why didn’t I let go the piercing scream that heaved in my chest? Why don’t I now let it out?
Because I, too, am civilized. Psychologically sanitized. I’m programmed to quickly clean out my desk, as if I really didn’t get fired but of my own volition am leaving this company that has been my daytime home for over twenty years.
Damn!
Late night
“So what do I do now?” Fear? Despair? Anger? Or all three? Tears filled Nancy’s eyes. “How can I face my friends? No, I will not hide. We’re going to the dance just as we planned.”
“I’ll find another job.” I hope. I just offered myself more assurance than I felt For who wants the unwanted? What’s the market value of yesterday’s success? Indeed, what do I do now?
Come on, Thomas Jordan Kettering. Stop feeling sorry for yourself. Don’t sit brooding. Nancy is right. Tomorrow night is the big country club dance and yes…we’re going. Not just because she is chair person of the planning committee and couldn’t stand to miss it, but also because, even if I have been pulled out of the spotlight, I’ve still got to go on with the show if putting on a good front has gotten me by all these years it’s going to see me though this one, too.
(To be continued)
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BELOW IS A QUOTE FROM A NEW SERIES…
A HEAVENLY CONSTRUCTION PROGRAM(1st in series) (on this Wyrck’s Writing blog)
…“in the world of man” identities are stolen all the time. It happened to us two summers ago. Someone reached into my wife’s purse and stole her identity. Went around proving they were her to a world that was more than willing to accept as fact what was obviously a lie.
We straightened it out, but for a short time “the things that man looks at” created an identity crisis.
But with God? No identity theft will ever take place. He knows who we are, the good and the bad and the in-between. And He loves us despite what He sees rather than because.
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