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Matthew 6:14-15
I think I’m safe in saying that at some point just about everyone has had an up close and personal encounter with a grudge. Unfortunately some seem to collect and hold on to hurts as if their life depended on it.
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Matthew 6:14-15
For if you forgive men their trespasses,
your father who is in heaven will forgive you.
But if you do not forgive men their trespasses,
neither will your father forgive you your trespasses.
I think I’m safe in saying that at some point just about everyone has had an up close and personal encounter with a grudge. Unfortunately some seem to collect and hold on to hurts as if their life depended on it.
So let’s stop and look at these sour grapes everyone has picked off the complaining vine and more than once. Look
at the harvest of hurts we all have stored away and consider the
results when we have not been able to get them out of our system.
The couple had been married for 15 years and lately their disagreements were beginning to multiply. But they wanted to find in their marriage what once they had had, so they both agreed to work at it.
And
as a way of doing this they made a rule that at the end of each day
they would write down something that was irritating them, driving them
up the wall, however you want to put it, and drop the piece of paper
into a fault box.
The wife was diligent in her efforts. The first day she dropped in a note that read, “Left the top off the jar of jelly.” The next day her note complained, “Left dirty socks on the floor - again.” On the third day she wrote down two more complaints. She continued in this vein for the next four days.
At the end of the week, they emptied their boxes and examined the contents.
The
husband looked troubled as he read her notes, but nodded his head in
agreement that these were indeed faults he needed to work on.
When the wife read his notes she found that he hadn’t played by the rules. On each of the seven sheets of paper were just three words, “I love you.”
As you might expect, this only made her madder. And so she turned and shouted at her husband. “You’re not playing by the rules. Don’t you understand that when you are upset you are supposed to say mean and spiteful things? And say them more than once as a way of proving you are right. And then you’re supposed to stay mad long enough to make sure the other person knows he’s wrong. If you don’t play by the rules, husband dear, how are we ever going to get along better?”
Does this sort of logic leave you shaking your head? Maybe leave you thinking perhaps you’ve wandered into the story of Alice in Wonderland? Yet, in spite of its lack of logic that is really how many people act. They
would love to have more peace and harmony in their relationships, yet
continue to follow the wrong paths to achieve that goal.
They have heard and maybe even read the Sermon on the Mount but fail to apply Christ’s message about forgiveness to themselves.
A motorcycle policeman was in a bad wreck. He broke his left leg and his right arm.
When he awoke after surgery he found the two casts in their proper places.
Then he looked down and saw a large bandage on his hairy chest. The kind that would be oh so painful to remove. Attached to the bandage was a note from his nurse, “A gift from the nurse you gave a ticket to last week.”
Some people don’t just carry a grudge around, they keep giving it as a gift over and over again.
Letting go of a perceived wrong, or of a real one, can be hard. For some, it is nigh unto impossible. They have a constant burn on and they don’t look very hard for a hose of forgiveness to put the fire out.
Some people never have seen an apology they were willing to give or to accept.
They nurse their hurts as if they were a babe in arms. If you ask them when they will forgive the person who has hurt them, and if they are honest, they will tell you NEVER. If asked, “Does that mean you are going to hold that grudge forever?” Their answer might well be, “Well, when I get to the pearly gates…I guess I’ll have to forgive them…but it won’t be easy.”
I know, they (and some places in THESE THOUGHTS, they is you and me)…they would deny this, but I think they worship a selective Christ.
They love the gentle, loving Christ.
They love that He who is a healer of bodies and souls.
They love the promise of eternal life beyond the door of death.
But
when they come face to face with His commandment to forgive – and not
just once, but seven times seventy, some Bible translations even spell
it out - 490 times - it sticks in their throat and they just can’t or
won’t do it.
That
teaching, that example Jesus gave us during His life here on earth… to
forgive, they erase that right out of the mix, right out of the picture. It just doesn’t fit what they are willing to do…so they ignore it…and they don’t do it.
And have you ever noticed that people who don’t forgive quite often become like the people they refuse to forgive? It’s
a strange phenomenon, but sometimes spending so much time and energy
engrossed in the faults of another, those faults have become part of
their own personality.
So
think on these things and if you see yourself anywhere in them...admit
that they are your faults and that they need to be prayed about rather
than make excuses for.
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Poor Richard's Almanack for the 20th Century
Sixty Plus and Not Holding
Boundaries Unlimited
I Am
The ABC"s of Parenting and Grandparenting
Letters to America
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