THE TYRANNY OF I DON'T WANNA!

This is a continuation of a series of Lenten thoughts appropriate to the remembering our Christ with all the awe He truly deserves.. Please consider sharing these Lenten thoughts with a host of your friends.

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It is more than a story that I am about to embellish. It is a history lesson. And as someone once said, “Those who do not learn from history are condemned to repeat it.”

A man named Peter huddled against a wall and shivered as he pulled his cloak more tightly around his shoulders. Not far away guards gathered round a fire too tiny to ward off the cold of a dark and moonless night.

It was 4 A.M. and grumbling members of the Grand Sanhedrin were arriving at the Temple. They were hardly happy at being awakened at such an ungodly hour.

However, they all agreed it was worth the inconvenience because it was time to be rid of this thorn in their side. This man from Nazareth who acted as if he had come from heaven itself.

As these Hebrew leaders swept past, a servant girl suddenly looked at the hooded Peter and cried out, “Are you not a disciple of this one called Jesus?”

A look of fear and then anger swept across his eyes as he hissed back in reply, “Away with you woman? You speak foolishness and would get me in trouble.”

At that moment an ancient door creaked open. Peter looked toward the sound, toward the house of Annas, toward the staircase that led down into the Courtyard. Toward Caiaphas who walked ahead of the soldiers. Toward the face of his Master, lighted by a lantern’s flickering flame. It was against the law to hold a criminal trial in darkness, but no one came forward to cry out, “Hold now!” No one.

An hour later, when the trial was well underway, a man standing close to Peter turned and staring hard into his face accused, “I know you. I have seen you more than once walking with this man now on trial. You are one of his disciples.” Peter blanched. Every part of his being called out for him to stand tall and faithful.

To be courageous rather than cowardly. Instead, softly now, for there was a great weariness in him…. no longer defiance… softly now, he almost whispered, “I have no idea what you are talking about.” The words burned in his throat and took away his breath.

To one of the guards overhearing the exchange, the man commented, “No matter what he says, that man is a disciple.”

“I am not…I am not…I am not,” Peter vehemently denied. And as he spoke a rooster, not far away, stretched himself, flapped his wings, raised his head and crowed.

It is not that he was unaware of what he ought to say and do. It was just that his fear was greater than his faith and so he was for a time ruled by the tyranny of “I don’t wanna.”

When Peter finally let Christ help him get his act together he didn’t rush toward safety anymore. Rather he roamed far and wide with Christ-like bravery. With Christian courage. With an ear finely tuned to an awakening conscience and a soul tuned into I oughta, rather than I don’t wanna.
Finally, this man Peter, who in a courtyard in Jerusalem had showed his favorite color was yellow and that it ran all the way up his back, went from I don’t wanna to I will!

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