RUST ON MY SOUL (31ST IN SERIES)

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RUST ON MY SOUL (A Novel) (Published by Bridge Press in 1985 & Distributed Internationally)

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INTRODUCTION (Repeated for those new to the series)

In an old loose leaf notebook, Thomas Kettering wrote when there was a cry from his heart. He wrote when his inner longing spilled over into the reality of his days. He did not write every day, only when he felt he must. How often he wrote or when is not important. The journey is what counts, for it is a diary about all of us, to all of us.

“A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step,” and even a stumble is a step.

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Evening

My neighbors wife has been dead for several months now. Through it all he has shown an inner strength I can only admire from afar.

He’s not happy and there is a sadness to his walk and talk, but something is different. Has God reached out and taken Sam’s pain in His creative hands and given it back in the form of spiritual maturity?

Is God really relevant to life and death? Could He be relevant to me?

I read in the paper the other day that waiting to accept God until one’s last moments is not only a cowardly act but a disappointing one.

What am I waiting for?

One day, when I have one foot in the grave, will my inner catalyst come alive? Why not now, when I’ve both feet in the midst of living? If I wait till near the end of my mortal melodrama, will my conversion become a bribe?

If I give God my life now it is a challenge. But do I really have the time and inclination? Or are my recent religious learning’s no more than fear in my forties?

Afternoon

I’m smart. I didn’t get where I am by being anything less. I’m well read. I don’t know all the answers but I know more than a lot of people. I’m sometimes arrogant and seldom less than confident in the midst of my peers.

I can converse with better than average skill on sales management, engineering, theology, politics, and a dozen other subjects. So why am I living this Mix-master life? Why do I do so much churning without settling on any one recipe?

I’m climbing the stairs again. I’ve been to the pit. I’ve agonized in the darkness. When Thomas Kettering, Jr. died, I filled the gap of grieving with work.

In my agony I spat in the face of God. I endured the nightmares because there was nothing else to do. I’m still not ready for prayer but I think I’ve given up on curses. Oh, God, will you be there in timeless eternity to hold my hand”

I’ve been handling time so badly.
 

TO BE CONTINUED

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A New Series on PAIN AND PROBLEMS

began on this blog “Wyrick’s Writings”

and will continue until finished.

Then a new Series on PRAYER will begin..

To view an abundance of unusual stories by Neil Wyrick go to his other blog ONE A DAY, YOUR SPIRITUAL VITAMINS

Click on the following URL

http://oneadayyourspiritualvitamins.blogspot.com/

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