RUST ON MY SOUL (11th in Series of Novel)

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RUST ON MY SOUL (A Novel) (Published by Bridge Press in 1985 & Distributed Internationally)
INTRODUCTION (Repeated for those new to the series)

In an old loose leaf notebook, Thomas Kettering wrote when there was a cry from his heart. He wrote when his inner longing spilled over into the reality of his days. He did not write every day, only when he felt he must. How often he wrote or when is not important. The journey is what counts, for it is a diary about all of us, to all of us. “A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step,” and even a stumble is a step.

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Morning

Lord, this isn’t a prayer. It’s an announcement.

Please get away from the door to my heart!

Sometimes your knocking drives me crazy. It’s not that I have not sinned and need no Savior; it is not that I have all wisdom and need no guidance; it is not that I am completely self-sufficient and need no help.

I‘m not ready, that’s all.

I’ve met a few who are so obsessed with heavenly things they’re no longer any earthly good.

I can’t handle that in other people and I couldn’t handle it in me. At least I’m not ready to try.


Evening

“Tom,” Nancy asked, “do you know how long it has been since we went out to dinner, just the two of us?”

And I knew Nancy’s question was more than culinary.

It asked, “What has happened to us?” Why has it happened? Is it too late to do anything about it?”

So the foray goes on and our confidence grows ragged. Battle traffic, inflationk, property taxes, crime.

I fight for my job and a decent wage.

I try to see that my children grow up without disaster, to keep my marriage on an even keel, to keep my sanity.

It is little wonder that a pinprick can sometimes draw a pint of blood.


Afternoon

I’ve got my name on the rolls and a place in the power, but God in my life? Forget it!

I’ve got enough trouble with this world; I don’t have time to worry about heaven.

And Christian obedience leaves me cold. I’ve never been one to take orders. Being a church member is quite enough without taking it too seriously.
Evening

I made a killing today yet here I sit with a bad feeling in the pit of my being. A year ago I’d have been out celebrating.

Instead, here I am writing in this damn diary again. Is there some moral law that my subconscious hasn’t quite forgotten?

It doesn’t bother other people I meet in business. Or does it? Could there be other spiritual Dr. Jeckylls and Mr. Hydes like me?

Edgar is in electronics and it must pay well. His pool is better than mine, his car is better than mine; his wife is more beautifully dressed than mine. (Better not tell Nancy that,)

His nose twitches without shame at the sweet smell of success. Yes; I’m envious of his outer successes, but it’s that inner feeling of content which he exuces that I so desp0erately want and need.

That’s where my real envy zeros in.

“God made me rich.” It was blatant but he seemed honestenough.Is that his secret to success?

Has he found a way to apply Christian ethics to the marketplace? I’d be ashamed to ask God to co-sign the last deal I made.

Is one of the best-kept corporate secrets the fact that even successful men have souls, and that when they are not properly fed they suffer from spiritual malnutrition?

Is Edgar completely honest and above board and still making a profit? Is he paying his workers more than the going wage and still making a profit? How can he be so foolish and wise all the same time…or is that what it is all about?

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TO BE CONTINUED 

(Complete book available on amazon.com) (great prices)
Neil is also the author of THE SPIRITUAL ABRAHAM LINCOLN (His last book)

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HIS 9TH BOOK “THE SPIRITUAL ABRAHAM LINCOLN” IS AVAILABLE ON Amazon.com KINDLE Reader